Vintage Bay Mofra's Bottom 50 of 2017 - the "finals were better last year" Edition

[Freofalcon]

Shane Yarran then.

Yeh.

Sure.

 

[Freofalcon]

57 ******* days this thread has been going for. ****kkkk offf

57 days

32 nominations

Adequate nomination to OP ball cupping time ratio.

 

[Stan_Darsh72]

Bennell and Lovett.

I'm more confused by Cooksen's defender that everyone hates. I initially thought Dawson but he showed up later in the post.

Baker and Crowley.

 

[Freofalcon]

Baker and Crowley.

Crowley went to another club and was highly regarded.

Baker would be a campaigner anywhere.

 

[Art Corvelay]

Baker and Crowley.

Baker would be a campaigner anywhere.

Snake_Baker?

 

[Black_White]

Is there a top 20?
Because it’s 41 plus pages and I looked at the first ten.....
Almost clawed out my eyes...
But still would like to know the top 20without spending 10 precious minutes trying to find it.

 

[bontshow]

Is there a top 20?
Because it’s 41 plus pages and I looked at the first ten.....
Almost clawed out my eyes...
But still would like to know the top 20without spending 10 precious minutes trying to find it.

Check the links in the OP, countdown's still going

 

[Art Corvelay]

Is there a top 20?
Because it’s 41 plus pages and I looked at the first ten.....
Almost clawed out my eyes...
But still would like to know the top 20without spending 10 precious minutes trying to find it.

I know that pain as a Collingwood supporter attempting to read. Why can't people just post more funny pictures?

 

[TedDougChris]

Check the links in the OP, countdown's still going

Clearly not smart enough to figure it out

 

[hawkman]

Think he got off lightly this year to be honest - you didn't even mention the questionable tatt?
What even is that thing, some sort of faded Australian flag that is weirdly light blue?

No point wasting comments about questionable tatts when there is a Stringer entry still to be done

 

[spenze]

Clearly not smart enough to figure it out

All those numbers with names after them...in a countdown, you'd need the Rosetta stone to work it out

 

[darklake]

Check the links in the OP, countdown's still going

Collin'would supporters!!! ..

 

[SaintsSeptember]

Bennell and Lovett.

I'm more confused by Cooksen's defender that everyone hates. I initially thought Dawson but he showed up later in the post.

I get it now, i was thinking of a Aboriginal who was in the GF but failed to fire a shot, like Leon.

 

[Stan_Darsh72]

I get it now, i was thinking of a Aboriginal who was in the GF but failed to fire a shot, like Leon.

Raph Clarke?

 

[WCErevival]

Think he got off lightly this year to be honest - you didn't even mention the questionable tatt?
What even is that thing, some sort of faded Australian flag that is weirdly light blue?

He's had laser treatment on it. Said he stopped because it hurt too much.

 

[hawkman]

He's had laser treatment on it. Said he stopped because it hurt too much.

All got a bit too hard and he wasn't up to it. Just like the Grand Final he was in

 

[SaintsSeptember]

Raph Clarke?

Never high profile. Played to his normal standards in the GF. ( touched it a few times, probably got caught holding the ball ).

 

[JHF1870]

What is this. A countdown to ****ing christmas

 

[Mofra]

Player 17 - Andrew Swallow


Pictured: An unprecedented photo of Swallow getting pinched and fondled at the same time

Andrew Swallow is the slowest ex-captain to grace the field in 2017 and is the perfect representation of the inexplicable optimism that North Supporters have regarding their club. Let me explain.

Before North offered millions of dollars to both Dusty and Kelly that would never be turned down because Dusty cares about money and Kelly's dad played a few games at Arden St decades ago, Andrew's brother David was drafted at pick 1 to the Gold Coast Suns. An anointed future star, North fans were delighted as they fully drank the kool aid in believing there would one day be a glorious reunion between the brothers at Arden St. Every year we were told, as Gav Urquhart continued to mow down Scott Pendlebury on the north board, the glorious reunion got closer and closer. Future midfield star David would want to play with his brother, nothing surer.

Of course, things turned out differently. David had a heap of injury and form issues and despite no sporting team really ever taking off in the Gold Coast, the Suns never really took off in the Gold Coast to the complete surprise of the AFL.
Oh, and he never expressed a desire to leave the white sandy beaches of the Gold Coast to head down to the red brick Victorian Fencing Centre which kindly lends it's bottom floor to North Melbourne.

This left Andrew alone to forge out his remaining career as skipper than hand the reigns over to <insert non-descript inside mid here> as it became obvious to everyone except Brad Scott that having a midfield of slow plodders and not developing kids at all was not a winning long term strategy.
So let us now fast-forward to 2017, or slow-forward more accurately. Andrew Swallow is "a trier" but cannot keep up with the pace of the modern game, either by legspeed or with decision making. When he does get the ball he gets caught faster than an Australian drug mule in Bali. Even the shabby semblance of a gameplan Braddles employs seems to be a bit hard for "Spitta" to process as anything beyond "see ball, chase the guy who got the ball" just takes up too much leg and brain energy.

There is actually a Bay thread (Waite) in "things that are quicker than Andrew Swallow", with examples such as:
- The NBN rollout
- Haley's Comet appearances
- Zeboyz thinking
- boydshow 's journey to modship
- US political action on gun control
- The Franz Josef glacier
- Harper Lee's follow up novel

So anyway Swallow, a slow inside mid, was retained while Brent "Raffles" Harvey, a quick goal-scoring running type, was retired last year. This robbed the Bay of some trolling opportunities given North have started doing it to themselves, like a serial masturbator who spikes his own drink.
The irony of Gold Coast knocking back Andrew's bid to play for them was lost on nobody, but to be fair they're deeply sommitted to their third re-build because this time it has to work.

So in summary, welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2017 Andrew Swallow.

 

[richoatthedisco]

Crowley went to another club and was highly regarded.

He went to Essendon.

 

[pirate bob]

Player 17 - Andrew Swallow


Pictured: An unprecedented photo of Swallow getting pinched and fondled at the same time

Andrew Swallow is the slowest ex-captain to grace the field in 2017 and is the perfect representation of the inexplicable optimism that North Supporters have regarding their club. Let me explain.

Before North offered millions of dollars to both Dusty and Kelly that would never be turned down because Dusty cares about money and Kelly's dad played a few games at Arden St decades ago, Andrew's brother David was drafted at pick 1 to the Gold Coast Suns. An anointed future star, North fans were delighted as they fully drank the kool aid in believing there would one day be a glorious reunion between the brothers at Arden St. Every year we were told, as Gav Urquhart continued to mow down Scott Pendlebury on the north board, the glorious reunion got closer and closer. Future midfield star David would want to play with his brother, nothing surer.

Of course, things turned out differently. David had a heap of injury and form issues and despite no sporting team really ever taking off in the Gold Coast, the Suns never really took off in the Gold Coast to the complete surprise of the AFL.
Oh, and he never expressed a desire to leave the white sandy beaches of the Gold Coast to head down to the red brick Victorian Fencing Centre which kindly lends it's bottom floor to North Melbourne.

This left Andrew alone to forge out his remaining career as skipper than hand the reigns over to <insert non-descript inside mid here> as it became obvious to everyone except Brad Scott that having a midfield of slow plodders and not developing kids at all was not a winning long term strategy.
So let us now fast-forward to 2017, or slow-forward more accurately. Andrew Swallow is "a trier" but cannot keep up with the pace of the modern game, either by legspeed or with decision making. When he does get the ball he gets caught faster than an Australian drug mule in Bali. Even the shabby semblance of a gameplan Braddles employs seems to be a bit hard for "Spitta" to process as anything beyond "see ball, chase the guy who got the ball" just takes up too much leg and brain energy.

There is actually a Bay thread (Waite) in "things that are quicker than Andrew Swallow", with examples such as:
- The NBN rollout
- Haley's Comet appearances
- Zeboyz thinking
- boydshow 's journey to modship
- US political action on gun control
- The Franz Josef glacier
- Harper Lee's follow up novel

So anyway Swallow, a slow inside mid, was retained while Brent "Raffles" Harvey, a quick goal-scoring running type, was retired last year. This robbed the Bay of some trolling opportunities given North have started doing it to themselves, like a serial masturbator who spikes his own drink.
The irony of Gold Coast knocking back Andrew's bid to play for them was lost on nobody, but to be fair they're deeply sommitted to their third re-build because this time it has to work.

So in summary, welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2017 Andrew Swallow.

What's going on with Oliver's hands?

 

[Deep]

Oliver is a creepy lookin questionable dude

 

[darklake]

Oliver is a creepy lookin questionable dude

As Swanny said:- If Oliver wasn't an AFL
footballer, he would be a virgin.

 

[LuvtheKangas]

Player 17 - Andrew Swallow


Pictured: An unprecedented photo of Swallow getting pinched and fondled at the same time

Andrew Swallow is the slowest ex-captain to grace the field in 2017 and is the perfect representation of the inexplicable optimism that North Supporters have regarding their club. Let me explain.

Before North offered millions of dollars to both Dusty and Kelly that would never be turned down because Dusty cares about money and Kelly's dad played a few games at Arden St decades ago, Andrew's brother David was drafted at pick 1 to the Gold Coast Suns. An anointed future star, North fans were delighted as they fully drank the kool aid in believing there would one day be a glorious reunion between the brothers at Arden St. Every year we were told, as Gav Urquhart continued to mow down Scott Pendlebury on the north board, the glorious reunion got closer and closer. Future midfield star David would want to play with his brother, nothing surer.

Of course, things turned out differently. David had a heap of injury and form issues and despite no sporting team really ever taking off in the Gold Coast, the Suns never really took off in the Gold Coast to the complete surprise of the AFL.
Oh, and he never expressed a desire to leave the white sandy beaches of the Gold Coast to head down to the red brick Victorian Fencing Centre which kindly lends it's bottom floor to North Melbourne.

This left Andrew alone to forge out his remaining career as skipper than hand the reigns over to <insert non-descript inside mid here> as it became obvious to everyone except Brad Scott that having a midfield of slow plodders and not developing kids at all was not a winning long term strategy.
So let us now fast-forward to 2017, or slow-forward more accurately. Andrew Swallow is "a trier" but cannot keep up with the pace of the modern game, either by legspeed or with decision making. When he does get the ball he gets caught faster than an Australian drug mule in Bali. Even the shabby semblance of a gameplan Braddles employs seems to be a bit hard for "Spitta" to process as anything beyond "see ball, chase the guy who got the ball" just takes up too much leg and brain energy.

There is actually a Bay thread (Waite) in "things that are quicker than Andrew Swallow", with examples such as:
- The NBN rollout
- Haley's Comet appearances
- Zeboyz thinking
- boydshow 's journey to modship
- US political action on gun control
- The Franz Josef glacier
- Harper Lee's follow up novel

So anyway Swallow, a slow inside mid, was retained while Brent "Raffles" Harvey, a quick goal-scoring running type, was retired last year. This robbed the Bay of some trolling opportunities given North have started doing it to themselves, like a serial masturbator who spikes his own drink.
The irony of Gold Coast knocking back Andrew's bid to play for them was lost on nobody, but to be fair they're deeply sommitted to their third re-build because this time it has to work.

So in summary, welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2017 Andrew Swallow.

A true champion who has declined, sadly. Happens to them all.

Probably not the only player who lost pace after a snapped achilles.


Anyway that pic must be from the game where Melbourne beat us ... oh wait, yet again they couldn't. Two losses to the team that finished 15th has gotta hurt when you miss the finals by percentage.


{exit stage left to angry shouts of "you don't get the Bay, campaigner!"}

 

[carnthedons]

What's going on with Oliver's hands?

He’s a rare ginger Italian?