Official Match Thread Season 37 Round 13 - East Side Hawks v Fighting Furies at The Eyrie

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Hello all and welcome to the thirteenth round of the thirty seventh season of the Sweet FA, I’m your host Chef Bob coming to you live from the Eyrie. This week we see the East Side Hawks host the Fighting Furies in a match that will certainly go down in history as an example of simulated football. Qooty I believe they call it. Odd looking concept, but there’s something about it. Almost hypnotic. Tell you what I like though, and that’s scran.

“What the heck is scran anyway, Chef Bob?” I hear you type. A fair and relevant question it is too. It has a few different yet related meanings, but the most common one refers to food of questionable quality. Originating in the north of England and Scotland, it has been popularised in recent times when describing fast food served at sporting venues. And today friends I hijack this week’s match thread opening posts by bringing to you several examples of the food served up at qooty grounds around Sweet, this time from the Eyrie.

Sweet, I give to you…

1713830709871.png

Both the East Siders and the Furies share the suburb of Punt, but today I’m at The Eyrie. Visitors to The Eyrie in recent seasons have complained that the qooty scran was burnt to a crisp before being somehow unburnt again. The reason for this was a malfunctioning Phoenix 1000 flame grilling unit, which they’ve offloaded to the Dragons in the most recent off-season as part of their unbranding.

What does that mean for the qooty scran at The Eyrie though? Well the pendulum has swung the other way, and everything they serve is raw. There’s the Fillet O’ Flesh (CM18.95):

1713831640986.png

There’s the Turn ‘n’ Burn Burger (CM18.95):

1713831678618.png

There’s the Galloping Glizzy (CM13.95):

1713831722724.png

And there’s a vegetarian offering for CM9.95:

1713831750669.png

Chef Bob’s Scran Rating:

1713831782087.png

Regarding the qooty, the Hawks are 7th on the ladder with a record of 6 & 5 and the Furies are 12th on the ladder with a record of 5 & 6 but technically 3 & 8 because the Furies like giving away premiership points for fun so let’s go with that sure why not – Hawks by 22.

Players to watch out for are [checks notes] Strigoi Zoops Tarkyn_24 crazywildhorse Edmund hunt & ShaunDuggan.

Captains please do the needful before midnight WA Bias time this coming Friday 1. Except for you omgfridge & James Colorado, yours are due in six hours’ time. That’ll give you enough of a buffer I reckon.

Bon Appétit, friends!​
 
Hello all and welcome to the thirteenth round of the thirty seventh season of the Sweet FA, I’m your host Chef Bob coming to you live from the Eyrie. This week we see the East Side Hawks host the Fighting Furies in a match that will certainly go down in history as an example of simulated football. Qooty I believe they call it. Odd looking concept, but there’s something about it. Almost hypnotic. Tell you what I like though, and that’s scran.

“What the heck is scran anyway, Chef Bob?” I hear you type. A fair and relevant question it is too. It has a few different yet related meanings, but the most common one refers to food of questionable quality. Originating in the north of England and Scotland, it has been popularised in recent times when describing fast food served at sporting venues. And today friends I hijack this week’s match thread opening posts by bringing to you several examples of the food served up at qooty grounds around Sweet, this time from the Eyrie.

Sweet, I give to you…

View attachment 1967922

Both the East Siders and the Furies share the suburb of Punt, but today I’m at The Eyrie. Visitors to The Eyrie in recent seasons have complained that the qooty scran was burnt to a crisp before being somehow unburnt again. The reason for this was a malfunctioning Phoenix 1000 flame grilling unit, which they’ve offloaded to the Dragons in the most recent off-season as part of their unbranding.

What does that mean for the qooty scran at The Eyrie though? Well the pendulum has swung the other way, and everything they serve is raw. There’s the Fillet O’ Flesh (CM18.95):

View attachment 1967950

There’s the Turn ‘n’ Burn Burger (CM18.95):

View attachment 1967951

There’s the Galloping Glizzy (CM13.95):

View attachment 1967952

And there’s a vegetarian offering for CM9.95:

View attachment 1967953

Chef Bob’s Scran Rating:

View attachment 1967954

Regarding the qooty, the Hawks are 7th on the ladder with a record of 6 & 5 and the Furies are 12th on the ladder with a record of 5 & 6 but technically 3 & 8 because the Furies like giving away premiership points for fun so let’s go with that sure why not – Hawks by 22.

Players to watch out for are [checks notes] Strigoi Zoops Tarkyn_24 crazywildhorse Edmund hunt & ShaunDuggan.

Captains please do the needful before midnight WA Bias time this coming Friday 1. Except for you omgfridge & James Colorado, yours are due in six hours’ time. That’ll give you enough of a buffer I reckon.

Bon Appétit, friends!​
I reckon you dragged those photos of the insta, Daily Dutch Lunch. I reckon I’ve seen all of the above eaten here.
 
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I reckon you dragged those photos of the insta, Daily Dutch Lunch. I reckon I’ve seen all of the above eaten here.
I shall never disclose my sources.
 

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What about your sauces that go with the menu items
Well OK sure - tartare, Frank's, American mustard and... uh, white.
 
...I'm listening...
The filet o fish is a once a week staple for most of colleagues, and the turn and burn is how you expect your hamburger round here. To be honest though, the Galloping Gizzy looks more like the standard meat replacement protein slab with something they call Joppie Saus. The idea, I’ve learned, is that as long as there is bread involved, doesn’t matter what is in-between.
 
James Colorado, do you eat that stuff they serve?

Season 1 Nbc GIF by The Good Place


I’ll bring a case of this stuff for the venue.

IMG_0802.jpeg
 
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The filet o fish is a once a week staple for most of colleagues, and the turn and burn is how you expect your hamburger round here. To be honest though, the Galloping Gizzy looks more like the standard meat replacement protein slab with something they call Joppie Saus. The idea, I’ve learned, is that as long as there is bread involved, doesn’t matter what is in-between.
I'm afraid to look up Joppie Saus.
 

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