RIP Cam McCarthy

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Hi all, just a reminder that should today's news be triggering for you then there are resources and people out there which I cannot recommend enough:

Lifeline - 13 11 14
Beyond Blue - 1300 224 636
MensLine Australia - 1300 789 978
Headspace - 1800 650 890

Otherwise feel free to reach out to one of us, or each other.

:purpleheart:
 
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The tiny tribute i made tonight was to have 23 sips of wine as I counted them, then raised the glass to Cam.
I happily recall sitting behind the punt Rd goals when he kicked that match winner.
But this is not about some old nobody being there when Cam starred for us.
I found a way (in my opinion) to remember that loved soul, and just wanted to maybe give others an idea of how they could remember Cam.
Vale Cam

On SM-G960F using BigFooty.com mobile app
 
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toenail11 said:
Zac is Alex’s business partner and good mates with Cam. He can say whatever he wants

This board is so ******* embarrassing
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I don't think the board is embarrassing. Very few of teh comments made about thsi issue aren't on the mark. We always should try and give those we disagree with some grace too.
 

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Woke up at 2am last night (post night shifts) and couldn't stop thinking about this. Without knowing the circumstances of any really, 4 deaths of young men associated with the club in recent years seems very, very excessive. Time for the club to get proactive on support for players and ex-players?
 
Noticed AB gave the address to the players in the huddle before the game. AP prob too emotional to give it. That he was able to play and play respectably was quite the achievement. He didnt have the intercept game he has been having and that's no surprise.

Haven't been a big fan of coach or captain (AP has been brilliant this year tho) but I thought they both represented FFC with class yesterday.
 
Minz said:
Woke up at 2am last night (post night shifts) and couldn't stop thinking about this. Without knowing the circumstances of any really, 4 deaths of young men associated with the club in recent years seems very, very excessive. Time for the club to get proactive on support for players and ex-players?
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It's a question worth asking.
None of these comments are intended to apply specifically to Cam or any individual situation.
Clubs and the AFL and the AFLPA are already switched on to player welfare during and post footy. From the time players hit teh AFL they are encouraged to strat planning for life post-footy.
It's true that you can always do more but it's also true that you have to stop somewhere. Society in general has talked about and actively destigmatised mental health for decades now. The resources poured into support services is enormous, Headspace alone has had over $2B in the past 15 years or so.
The sad truth is that very often drugs and alcohol are chicken-egg factors in poor mental health, especially for males. As long as humanity glorifies/encourages/trivialises drugs/alcohol (I do this myself, I'm not saying it is bad to party) we must all accept our degree of reponsibility for the inevitable casualties.

EDIT: 'Of the $2.3bn allocated in the 2020–21 federal budget to new mental health expenditure, almost $766m was directed to Headspace...'
 
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EastcoastDocker said:
Noticed AB gave the address to the players in the huddle before the game. AP prob too emotional to give it. That he was able to play and play respectably was quite the achievement. He didnt have the intercept game he has been having and that's no surprise.

Haven't been a big fan of coach or captain (AP has been brilliant this year tho) but I thought they both represented FFC with class yesterday.
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Yep. I noticed the same. I think Fyfe's game was definitely negatively impacted to a significant extent too.
 
EastcoastDocker said:
Noticed AB gave the address to the players in the huddle before the game. AP prob too emotional to give it. That he was able to play and play respectably was quite the achievement. He didnt have the intercept game he has been having and that's no surprise.

Haven't been a big fan of coach or captain (AP has been brilliant this year tho) but I thought they both represented FFC with class yesterday.
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Serong spoke about it too. https://thewest.com.au/sport/freman...ake-of-tragic-cam-mccarthy-passing-c-14623630
 
DocT said:
It's a question worth asking.
None of these comments are intended to apply specifically to Cam or any individual situation.
Clubs and the AFL and the AFLPA are already switched on to player welfare during and post footy. From the time players hit teh AFL they are encouraged to strat planning for life post-footy.
It's true that you can always do more but it's also true that you have to stop somewhere. Society in general has talked about and actively destigmatised mental health for decades now. The resources poured into support services is enormous, Headspace alone has had over $2B in the past 15 years or so.
The sad truth is that very often drugs and alcohol are chicken-egg factors in poor mental health, especially for males. As long as humanity glorifies/encourages/trivialises drugs/alcohol (I do this myself, I'm not saying it is bad to party) we must all accept our degree of reponsibility for the inevitable casualties.

EDIT: 'Of the $2.3bn allocated in the 2020–21 federal budget to new mental health expenditure, almost $766m was directed to Headspace...'
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I'm curious about the resources in mental health support services, because whatever we're doing, it doesn't work. In practice, as a healthcare worker who sees a lot of presentations associated with mental health, it seems that community support services are significantly under-resourced, and every single place I've worked is clearly massively short on mental health beds for inpatient care (ridiculously so). Perhaps Headspace is just not that useful?

I've spent a lot of time talking about this to a friend who's an experienced Psychiatrist who's spent years in the public system both in WA and elsewhere, and they also report significant under-resourcing of mental health community support; apparently WA used to have a quite holistic state system but as money has been hived off into non-public services, it's become disjointed and has basically fallen in a heap... something I see in my patients every single shift.
 
wakojako said:
During the 2022 season every time I saw him he seemed to be getting better. Looked like he finally defeated his demons. Last year he went AWOL and it was a little worrying. The thing about Cam was no matter what he was going through, he was always happy and down for a chat. I heard his old man is a good bloke as well. His family must be so devastated. Rest in peace Cam, you will be missed ❤️
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Quazar2 said:
I cried my guts out yesterday, I don't care what anyone thinks of me. This type of thing hits home when I think about these guys, so young...living their dream (something we all want to do, deep down inside..), only to see it become their nightmare. No one knows exactly how they think or feel except those closest to them or anyone they can confide in - which would be hard in their bubble, especially when they're delisted and become yesterday's news. For many, they're just confined to the scrapheap.

I watched the game last night, I couldn't care less about the result. I really didn't want to, but a part of me romanticised that Cam could 'influence' the game from "beyond" and so I (begrudgingly) tuned in. I choked up seeing Fyfe and Pearce before the bounce and I knew then the game was lost. Not that that matters to me.

Just a 'friendly' reminder. They're not robots these guys, it was the wrong time for them to have to play emotionally/mentally, but unfortunately, the game must 'go on'. We wouldn't want to upset the AFL coffers now. Their minds were not in it enough to truly be focused and what they did, was with gusto, heart and passion. They didn't have the class to punish Sydney in the game, but....as I keep saying, it's all irrelevant right now.

Ultimately, the show will go on...Cam will be forgotten, and the rabid, tunnel-visioned fans here (and elsewhere) will go back to focusing on their precious football and lamenting the 'misfortunes' of the team whenever they fall or fail at the first hurdle. The cycle of life, including death.

RIP Cam. I'm glad you got your wish to represent the club, if only for a brief moment in time. You will be sorely missed, even from those that never truly knew you
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I was hoping the game board would have been full of support for our boys - I cried the entire game, and the result didn't really matter
 

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Thinking about it controversial call but I feel anyone who had a red hot crack at Fyfes performance last night should may be have a bit of a think about it and take a bit of a look at themselves. I don't know what people expected from some of the players last night to be honest. I get it. I'm a Freo person as well and I get as frustrated as the next person but gee whizz.

Knowing that AP and Fyfey had a pretty close connection with Cam and the likelihood that Cam died by suicide it is not uncommon from people close to the person to feel incredible guilt. Especially if they were aware of the struggles the person was having and especially when they are natural leaders like AP and Fyfey who take on responsibility for those around them. They would be thinking about why they couldn't 'save' him. Such a terrible and unfair burden to feel but it's very possible that the two of them and maybe others went into the game with that on their shoulders.

I don't know how AP played to be honest and my respect for him has grown massively.
 
I think it's fair to give the team a bit of a reprieve this week considering the circumstances, we can all be as invested in the team as we want to be, we can want the team to produce the best on field performances possible, but if we were ever going to cut them some slack, last night is the night to cut said slack, at the end of the day, it is just football, for some it might not just be football, but when something like this happens, it sure as hell is bigger than football, a young man lost his life far sooner than he should of, that's a travesty, and I think it's only fair for the players to get their time to grieve and come to terms with what happened.
 
raffrox said:
Thinking about it controversial call but I feel anyone who had a red hot crack at Fyfes performance last night should may be have a bit of a think about it and take a bit of a look at themselves. I don't know what people expected from some of the players last night to be honest. I get it. I'm a Freo person as well and I get as frustrated as the next person but gee whizz.

Knowing that AP and Fyfey had a pretty close connection with Cam and the likelihood that Cam died by suicide it is not uncommon from people close to the person to feel incredible guilt. Especially if they were aware of the struggles the person was having and especially when they are natural leaders like AP and Fyfey who take on responsibility for those around them. They would be thinking about why they couldn't 'save' him. Such a terrible and unfair burden to feel but it's very possible that the two of them and maybe others went into the game with that on their shoulders.

I don't know how AP played to be honest and my respect for him has grown massively.
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yep, it's like they had no compassion after what we witnessed pre-game
 
FreoGirl said:
I was hoping the game board would have been full of support for our boys - I cried the entire game, and the result didn't really matter
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Same. Cried on and off during the game but ugly cried as soon as I got home.

I’m not sure how many people have experienced the loss of family or friends with suicide but it really cuts deep. I don’t know how they were able to play.


Sent from my iPhone using BigFooty.com
 
Clemen said:
Same. Cried on and off during the game but ugly cried as soon as I got home.

I’m not sure how many people have experienced the loss of family or friends with suicide but it really cuts deep. I don’t know how they were able to play.


Sent from my iPhone using BigFooty.com
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I personally relived some of my experiences. There's always guilt, remorse, and regret over things you said or forgot to say. BUT< I never had to grieve in front of 40,000 people (and whoever else was watching on tv).

It's very difficult to judge. I felt the commentators almost ignored the event, prior to the game, and still imagined an unaffected Fremantle team was going to front up to Sydney.
 
raffrox said:
Thinking about it controversial call but I feel anyone who had a red hot crack at Fyfes performance last night should may be have a bit of a think about it and take a bit of a look at themselves. I don't know what people expected from some of the players last night to be honest. I get it. I'm a Freo person as well and I get as frustrated as the next person but gee whizz.

Knowing that AP and Fyfey had a pretty close connection with Cam and the likelihood that Cam died by suicide it is not uncommon from people close to the person to feel incredible guilt. Especially if they were aware of the struggles the person was having and especially when they are natural leaders like AP and Fyfey who take on responsibility for those around them. They would be thinking about why they couldn't 'save' him. Such a terrible and unfair burden to feel but it's very possible that the two of them and maybe others went into the game with that on their shoulders.

I don't know how AP played to be honest and my respect for him has grown massively.
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I think he felt like he had to show leadership (as did Fyfe) - heck of a task for a young AB to take on. Our young men shouldn't be faced with this trauma.

I was never fond of JLO, but was super impressed with how he spoke post game. It's going to be a bumpy ride for a while.

Anybody who tried to defend our players online last night just got slammed.
 
FreoGirl said:
you just need to read some of the posts on here to know the level of abuse thrown at Freo players
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yes sadly by their own supporters. !


A young man who had dreamed all his life of playing football with his favourite team, dream destryoed due to illness he has no control over. Would be so hard to be so shattered.

We all need to ensure we speak to those we love and share those down moments as well as the good times.
Not sharing the bad times sometimes makes people put on the SMILE and bottle up the sadness inside that eventually overwhelms them

Show more love is what we need to do.
 
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FreoGirl said:
Anybody who tried to defend our players online last night just got slammed.
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Most of the players would have found out it was official on gameday (Friday) I think. Don't know how they managed to play, and yet they did. Think we should all be really proud of the team, even after a loss, unbelievable effort to get on the field and if it weren't for errant goalkicking we would have been a chance.

RIP Cam, and hope his family and friends are coping during this awful time.
 
sansian said:
Should the game have been postponed?
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I have thought about this a lot

In some ways we should use this situation to learn from. We saw the raw pain and impact on the young 'survivors'. I don't believe their was a right or wrong solution because it's a really unusual circumstance. The club is probably only able to assist with proper counselling today (or even yesterday).

We keep talking about how more "needs to be done for mental health", especially with young men, but nothing ever really happens that's working towards improvements.

The media keeps reporting on it, then provides a vehicle for young players to be attacked. Just yesterday The West Australian Sports published an article about Amiss, which just allowed old men (usually opposition supports) to make remarks like "He's just soft". These kids have grown up with social media, and it has a huger impact on them than some of us who have the benefits of maturity, and we aren't judged by the media 24/7.

I think players like Fyfe and Pearce really hoped to be super heroes and dedicate the game to Cam, but they are just humans. The following dat South Freo and Peel players claimed they "did it for Cam", which must make the Freo players feel even worse about letting Cam down. Simpson stated that Barrass was mentally struggling because he was mates with Cam. The GWS result was probably impacted as well.

My son's school friend was murdered when he was only 8. The school had no idea what to do to assist the kids and the community, because it's not something that happens very often in WA. I don't think the AFL has anything in place for emergencies like this. Adelaide has struggled since Phil Walsh was murdered. Their game was called off as a "mark of respect" in 2016.

My biggest disappointment was the lack of empathy from the commentators before the game, and their expectations of 'business as usual'.
 
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