Fremantle Jokes

[EagleEgo]

Three old footy fans are in a church, praying for their teams.
The first one asks, "Oh Lord when will Collingwood next in the Grand Final?" God Replies, "In the next five years."
"But I'll be dead by then," says the man.
The second one asks, "Oh Lord, when will Melbourne next be in the Top Eight?"
The Good Lord - answers, "In the next ten years."
"But I'll be dead by then," says the man.
The third one asks, "Oh Lord when will Fremantle win the Premiership?".
God answers, "I'll be dead by then!"

Eerily accurate

Collingwood premiership in 2010
Melbourne on track for finals by 2019
Fremantle on track to never win a premiership

Sad! 9 precious years has gone!
I have never been that correct before!

 

[Nuke Fremantle]

Why have Fremantle moved out to Cockburn? It's the nearest they'll get to 'Success'.

 

[EdCurnowRules]

Clive Waterhouse got a job at a factory at Welshpool once he had retired, and was doing his induction with the boss... The boss asked “so Clive, do you know how to make coffee?”. Clive responds “yes, yes I do”. The boss nods, and asks “and do you know how to drive a forklift?” Clive responds “* me how big is the urn?”

 

[kranky al]

Clive Waterhouse got a job at a factory at Welshpool once he had retired, and was doing his induction with the boss... The boss asked “so Clive, do you know how to make coffee?”. Clive responds “yes, yes I do”. The boss nods, and asks “and do you know how to drive a forklift?” Clive responds “**** me how big is the urn?”

Waterhouse

And shithouse

 

[EdCurnowRules]

Waterhouse

And shithouse

Clive Waterhouse and Daniel Hargraves had just had a session smoking bongs when Clive decided he was hungry, so he called up his favourite pizza place. The women on the phone said “sure love, one large meatlovers... how many pieces should we slice that in to? 6.. or 8?” Clive thought for a moment “ no, only 6 slices tonight thanks, I’m not sure I could handle 8”

I’ll show myself out

 

[EagleEgo]

Browsing the AFL Sliding door this morning about Fremantle: Sliding Doors: round 12 - http://m.afl.com.au/news/2018-06-08/sliding-doors-round-12

IF
Ross was prepared to produce a flosser in the coach's box in round 11 ...

THEN
a nail cutter in round 12? A nose-hair trimmer perhaps? Hair straightener?

You never know, Ross might take a wooden spoon in the coach box this weekend for his instant noodle!

 

[FKASC]

Budding

 

[Monocle]

What’s long and hard and f**** most Dockers Supporters?














Primary School.

 

[CazC30]

The Dockers club shop has a new line out for girls... It's called the Fremantle Dockers bra... In true tradition it has no cups or support.

 

[kranky al]

A teacher asked her class how many of them were Dockers fans.
All the kids raised their hands except for Little Johnny.
The teacher asked Little Johnny why he has decided to be different...again.
Little Johnny said, 'Because I'm not a dockers fan.'
The teacher asked, 'Why aren't you a dockers fan?'
Johnny said, 'Because I'm an eagles fan.'
The teacher asked him why he's an eagles fan.
Little Johnny answered, 'Well, my Mum's an eagles fan and my Dad's an eagles fan, so I'm an eagles fan.'
Annoyed by this answer, the teacher asked, 'If your Mum was a moron and your Dad was an idiot, what would that make you?'
Little Johnny replied, 'A dockers fan.'

 

[WillieNillie]

Nathan Fyfes girlfriend was going down on him, In a moment of ecstasy she chimes in with "Oh baby your spraying it everywhere"
Fyfe answers "But I havnt even ejaculated yet"
"Yeh i know, I was watching your 2018 highlights package on the TV"

 

[La Dolce Vita]

#closertoaflag

 

[daddy_4_eyes]

Q. How many dockers players does it take to win a flag?
A. 276 fruitless careers and counting



*211 who donned the jumper + 52 who never played a game + 13 still listed but yet to play